”…and the other would propel me into some sort of freak preacher, so not caring about anything but showing love like Jesus did to me.” Well said Kelly Gau.
The “propelling” part is happening to me, not so much by my ‘choice’ but rather by His Spirit. And it’s a painful, bumpy, awkward and yet joyful and peaceful process. Make any sense? Jason Gray puts my feelings about this process into words that get close…
My heart is laid
Under Your blade
As you carve out Your image in me
You cut to the core
But still you want more
As you carefully, tenderly ravage me
And You peel back the bark
And tear me apart
To get to the heart
Of what matters most
I’m cold and I’m scared
As your love lays me bare
But in the shaping of my soul
The cut makes me whole
It’s worth it for me. The exchange of His life for mine. Yes Lord. Here am I, yours to do with as you please. It is your “setting apart” work in me that is so scandalously unfair… so much grace to a rebel child of Adam. Please cut away all that hinders my unhindered adoration of you, Lord Jesus, who was slain for me, and who is worthy of every ounce of my praise.
At Rest In Him 