Pronouns

Hey Religious Right… use the correct (or you might say “preferred”) pronouns for transgender folks.

Just do it.

Yeah. Even if you think somehow it’s causing you to “affirm a lie.”

A pronoun is not nearly as important as a human soul.

It’s just a word.

A courtesy. An extending of respect and human dignity.

It took me four years to become theologically affirming.

That’s because I have a high view of scripture. I’m one of those who wants to know “what does the Bible say?”

(It took me time to become theologically affirming. A lot of time. So I have great tolerance, love, and understanding towards those who “wish” they could get there, but are struggling.)

Here’s how I acted before I became biblically affirming.

You could do these things now:

• I loved my queer friends. Deeply. As equal image bearers of the Divine.

• I listened to their stories. With empathy. Without judgment or “but the Bible says.”

• I decided that going to a gay wedding, or baking the cake, or building the website did not mean I was “endorsing” their marriage. It meant I supported them as a friend. They already knew my “Bible Says” view. I didn’t need to throw that in their face. (I actually had to decide this, as a dear close family friend, who was gay, was planning a marriage.)

• I supported legalized gay marriage in a pluralistic, secular society. That did not have to mean I thought it was a Biblical marriage. It just meant that I wanted my neighbors to be able to practice their religion, like I wanted the same right from them.

• I used “preferred pronouns.” And my conscience was fine. How? Because they knew what church I attended. They knew that I was an evangelical. They knew my “Bible Beliefs.” (And even if they didn’t, did they need to know right away? Really?) I wasn’t “endorsing” their transitioning by using common courtesy.

• I could stop saying “but they’re just pretending to be a man.” That’s just hurtful, unnecessary, and didn’t need to be said. Anywhere, or anytime. And I could still hold my “Bible View.” How did I really know if they were “pretending” or if it was something deeper. Maybe I could give them the benefit of the doubt.

• I dropped the “sin” word which is so triggering. I replaced it, when the discussion needed to be had at all (which is far less often than the Religious Right think)… I replaced it with… “not God’s best plan.” (Which I knew even then was still hurtful. I empathetically acknowledged that. I found that a heck of a lot less triggering to my fellow suffering human being friends.)

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Every conservative Christian could do these things today. Right now. And not violate their conscience. I did. Before I was fully affirming.

Thanks for listening.